1. "I'm sorry BUT..." (as in "I'm sorry BUT here's why what I did wasn't so bad" or "I'm sorry BUT I think you are overreacting")
2. "I'm sorry IF..." (as in "I'm sorry if I hurt you").
That second one is particularly pernicious because it means that the apologizer is not actually taking responsibility for his or her actions. It defeats the purpose of step 2 by failing to acknowledge that one has, in fact, done something worth apologizing for.
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Two common failures on this one are:
1. "I'm sorry BUT..." (as in "I'm sorry BUT here's why what I did wasn't so bad" or "I'm sorry BUT I think you are overreacting")
2. "I'm sorry IF..." (as in "I'm sorry if I hurt you").
That second one is particularly pernicious because it means that the apologizer is not actually taking responsibility for his or her actions. It defeats the purpose of step 2 by failing to acknowledge that one has, in fact, done something worth apologizing for.