(no subject)

[aroraborealis]

I know what it's like for me to be a fat woman, but here's a great article by a man who loves fat women.

Comments

[dbang.livejournal.com]

That's a good article.

I'm still pretty ambivalent, though, about guys for whom fat is a fetish, which it sounds to me is true for the author of the article, despite his denial.

I wish there were more people who had broad ranges of interests, or whose determining factor for physical attraction were more varied.

[sandhawke.livejournal.com]

If you don't by his denial, what is the difference between a fetish and a preference? Is every non-standard preference in a sexual context a fetish?

I don't know if he's telling the truth about everything, but if he is, it sounds like he has a very normal sexual preference, not unlike those people have between genders.

[keyne.livejournal.com]

Yeah, same question here.

[aroraborealis.livejournal.com]

Fetishes are always difficult for me to wrap my head around, and the more intensely fetishized something is, the more alien I find the fetishizer or the thoughts that lead to fetishization. I did get some of that from this guy, but in a way that seemed pretty honest and realistic to me. I mean, if he was into fat women all along and repressed it, that's a pretty clear path to fetishization.

That said, I got, also, from this article that he got beyond the fetish by also wanting to find a woman who he loved, not just who he could objectify.

And I sure as hell appreciate his being willing to talk about it and be up front about his preference.

[dbang.livejournal.com]

?

[dbang.livejournal.com]

I took his point to be: I didn't MAKE her into a tomato. I love that she is, but I don't take responsibility for her being that way.

[sandhawke.livejournal.com]

Gosh, I wonder how many men are like he was for years -- secretly wanting to date fat women but dating thin ones instead because of peer pressure?

[aroraborealis.livejournal.com]

In my experience, plenty :) But, yes, I've wondered just how widespread it is, too.

I'm missing the analogy

[dbang.livejournal.com]

Women having a secret desire to...be fat...but...staying thin out of peer pressure?

[drwex]

One of the regrets of my high school years is that I didn't have the spine to stand up to peer pressure and date the big-and-beautiful woman I thought was so hot. I sublimated it into intense lust for the women swimmers who are big and wide-shouldered and have large (albeit muscular) thighs and chests. OK, now I'm getting myself bothered. Focus, focus.

[rdhdsnippet.livejournal.com]

Totally off-topic... I haven't seen your kids in forever and a day, but apparently they just keep getting cuter!

And on-topic, I duno. I never had a problem getting a date when I was fat, and I don't particularly have a problem now that I'm thin.

I DID have a problem finding dates when I was self-conscious and terminally shy (as opposed to today's mere painful shyness). I think lots of fat women feel that way because of societal pressure, which then becomes one of those nasty perpetuating cycles.

[hammercock.livejournal.com]

Thank goodness for men who think larger women are hot. When I started thinking about WLS, my sweetie was supportive, but worried that I would get *too* skinny. I assured him that it wasn't going to happen. :) I've never questioned for a moment that he finds me attractive and have never thought it was a fetish. He just likes big butts, and he cannot lie. :)